2011年8月19日

【譯詩】焉知荒徑通何景?-縮譯佛洛斯特《荒徑獨行》一詩

今年詩硯齋書法師生展時吳鳴大師兄擔剛了一場演講,其中引用了美國詩人佛洛斯特(Robert Lee Frost,1874~1963)的名詩《The Road Not Taken》,並以《林中兩路分(無人走過的路)》作為詩題。吳鳴大師兄引用的版本如下:

The Road Not Taken


Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
我矗立金黃落葉滿鋪的樹林中,眼前兩條小徑蜿蜒,
And sorry I could not travel both
可惜我不能同時涉足;
And be one traveler, long I stood
我站立良久,形影孤獨,
And looked down one as far as I could
我將視線順著其中一條,遠遠眺望,
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
直到小徑鑽入灌木叢中。
Then took the other, as just as fair,
然後選了另外一條,它同樣美麗宜人;
And having perhaps the better claim,
因為沿路草長及膝,似乎等待旅人踐踏,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
使我的選擇,或許有了更好的理由。
Though as for that the passing there
儘管往來的足跡,
Had worn them really about the same,
其實對兩者的磨損程度相當。
And both that morning equally lay
清晨新落的葉子,覆蓋了小徑,
In leaves no step had trodden black.
腳下不曾被旅人步伐染污的落葉,我踏上旅途。
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
噢!就把平坦的那條留待下一次吧!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
然而一個旅程會導向另一個旅程,這個道理我明白,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
也不禁令我懷疑可有機會舊地重遊。
I shall be telling this with a sigh
多年、多年以後的某個時刻,
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
我將寬慰地吐著氣,述說這段經歷:


Two roads diverged in a wood, and I–
在金黃落葉滿鋪的樹林中,眼前兩條小徑蜿蜒,而我…
I took the one less traveled by,
我踏上乏人問津的那條,
And that has made all the difference.
也展開了截然不同的人生。
今忽有詩想,欲將此詩譯作七絕一首。

一般而言,只取原意、未按原文所做的翻譯,叫作「衍譯」;翻譯時作情節刪減的,叫作「節譯」。然較原詩之長,吾人所譯只有四句,稱為「衍譯」似乎名實不符;而此譯又非截取一段而譯,亦算不上「節譯」。想想,就姑且稱為「縮譯」好了。

詩題譯作《荒徑獨行》,譯詩如下:

穿林漫行遇歧路,
一有人跡一荒蕪,
焉知荒徑通何景?
未肯人間作同途。


末一句原擬作「不與人間作同途」,其詞過激,乃改之!


5 則留言:

幗英 提到...

師兄原來已默默踏著師父的腳印,朝詩人之路前進了......

幗英 提到...

"不與"會讓人感覺高傲,"未肯"帶點不願妥協的堅持,是溫和點兒,師兄用字真講究!佩服!!

小杜白雲 提到...

在外文系的大學姐跟前,這是獻醜了!

匿名 提到...

我強烈懷疑石頭學弟的初戀情人是中文系的!!
PS:還是,跟現在身邊的是同一人?

小杜白雲 提到...

哈哈!我沒有交過中文系的女朋友!事實上,中文系的女生我都沒認識幾個!